Friday, March 27, 2009

Grave News.. In the Most Literal Sense

There's been a death in the opposite house...

Emily Dickinson's famous poem which I have learnt in form five has rung true. At times of terrible tragedy, I have always found myself unconsciously shedding tears.

Yesterday morning, a neighbour of mine faced the death of someone close to them. The wife's aunt died in the morning while the maid was giving her some relief from her aches. She had been aching all over the body, particularly her back and her neck. So, that morning, she asked the maid to help massage her. After barely one minute, she started to list and no sooner, she was unconscious.

I was getting ready for a driving test (which, to my relief, I have passed) when I received a phone call from my aunt, who is also my neighbour telling me the news. While waiting for the instructor to fetch me, I made a brief visit to the mourning family.

I could see that the wife was crying but holding it in, from the way her red eyes looked at me, thanking me for coming by and pay my last respects (al-Fatihah, verses from Yaasin). I saw the corpse, covered by the batik cloth and I cried. The coroner had left while I was entering the compound.

After I got back from the test, I went over to her house and looked after her youngest, her daughter, who cried, begging her mother to take her to see her grandmother's sister laid to rest. The rest of the family had followed the car. Luckily, she was easily cajoled so she watched Playhouse Disney as we waited for her family to come home. She kept asking why her mother was yet to come home so I made a few excuses until her mother finally did arrive.

She was so perceptive for a child her age. For so young a child (she is five), she said her grandmother had died and that she was going to be buried below the earth where grasses grow on top. She said her grandmother was no longer alive, and that all of them are going to pray and perform the solat jenazah. She also said that God loves her grandmother and that he has plans for her -something I had told her earlier and she still understood.

It is in this moment that I honestly say: Death changes us. It may not change everything but one person's thoughts and actions leave ripples in time. God has laid the hands of fate onto us for only God knows what's in store for us. Whatever it is, God has the greater plan and as god's creation on earth, we are created by God and to God we will return.

My fellow sisters and brothers in Islam, let's dedicate an al-Fatihah for this lady who had been called back by God. Amiin.

Sunday, March 22, 2009

Starlight, Starbright...

Ah Vous! Derai Je Maman...

The stars are bright tonight...
- Firenze, Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone

Yes, I do quote his wisdom. The stars certainly are bright tonight as I gaze upon the night sky of Shah Alam, Selangor, Malaysia.

It is unusually bright that I felt moved. My hands suddenly moved towards the mobile phone in my pocket to make a call towards Fauzi, mi amor. He picked up his phone and told me that he was in his car and he's gazing upon the same sky as I was. Well, he said he's not at home as he's the on duty muazzin tomorrow morning so that means he's staying back at the Mujahideen Mosque in Damansara Utama.

At the time of the call, it was 10 p.m. Watched One Tree Hill @ 10.30 p.m. Poor Lucas. Dumped TWICE. Man, that's critical.

Anyway, I'm posting again in rememberance of God's gift tonight in the form of the breathtaking view of the stars tonight. Perfectly aligned to show the sign of Pisces. There were slightly more dim stars flecking the brightest of them, creating an illusion of speckles of dusty grains of sand on the beach. I only wished I could capture the view on camera but the camera could do no justice. Hence, I am typing away to keep this memorable event on black and white...

So, adios mi amigos. You'll hear from me pretty soon.

Major Changes Underway...

When life suddenly sprouts turnips instead of lemons, you know you have to do something about it...

I haven't been a faithful blogger lately. Here's an excuse: the phone line was cut off so no internet connection for almost 3 weeks! Ha! How about that?

Anyway, I received my results. 8As and 2Bs. I cried because of the two Bs. At least, I thanked my teachers right after, whom, in my honest opinion have poured lots of love and knowledge my brain certainly had absorbed through those years.

By the way, I received distinctions in Physics and GCE-O English! Good news for me.

Right now, I'm trying to find relevant courses thathave to do with English Language and Linguistics though I don't mind at all doing Electronic Engineering. However, I am actually looking forward to studying my first choice and also working on a diploma of political science. I am aiming to be a lecturer OR diplomat. Let's hope I get to be the latter.

In the mean time, I am trying to enrol in language classes, particularly French and German as well as English for Business and Communication. That way I could be prepared for the challenges I would face later on when I do pursue a career in International Cooperation.

However, I am having a financial crisis. If I do not recieve a scholarship or study loan, I would have to find a part-time programme to pay for the tuition fees. If, however, I do receive one, I would be absolutely releived as my mother would not have to fork out a hefty sum of money to support my studies in uni/college. Mom would be able to pay her debts and the rent.

As for a few bright moments, I am quite content that, even without asking for rewards, my relatives still found in their hearts the compassion to award me with monetary gifts to help support my future to commend me on my SPM results.

So, without further ado, I say THANK YOU GOD! Without your blessings and compassion, I would never have the pleasures in life presented in ways I could never imagine.

By the way, I cannot play the piano anymore. Mom sold our piano to the dealer who turned out to be its first owner. So if I have a hankering to play the piano, I would have to go to my neighbour's house (we're close, by the way), just to sastisfy my addiction.

So, au revior mon ami! I'll be posting again as soon as I can.